Date: Tuesday, June 24, 2008
i read this from Jodi Picoult's Nineteen Minutes
you can feel people staring; its like heat that rises from the pavement during summer, like a poker in the small of your back. you dont have to hear a whisper, either, to know that it's about you.
i used to stand in front of the mirror in the bathroom to see what they were staring at. i wanted to know what made their heads turn, what it was about me that was so incredibily different. at first i couldnt tell. i mean, i was just me.
then one day, when i looked in the mirror, i understood. i looked into my own eyes and i hated myself, maybe as much as all of them did.
that was the day i started to believe they might be right.
this is a story about a boy who was bullied and boycott since very young, like kindergarten. grown up, and shot more than 10 kids in his high school one day. hmmm.. i'm about one third in the story. pretty enjoy. this is my lunch past time at work..
anyway i'm confirmed! i'm so happy! beacuse it shows that i am capable (: it just means to me. because i put in effort. and it is recognized. i started on 12 may, and 20 june, leona told me they decided to confirm me earlier. it was supposed to be 3 months probation. hmm.. but i will only see difference in my july's pay. well. i need money. i am scrimping now.
a separate matter.
there was nothing on 2nd month!
Signing Off~